7/15/13
Instinctive mothering
I was talking with my good friend Eden, who had been talking with her 90 year old aunt, about how women are losing their instinct to mother. I am 100% on board with this. My theory is that there are so many books and so called experts out there telling us that we have to do x, y and z this or that way and if we don't look what could happen to our kids, you must read so many books before you have your baby and you must take parenting classes, breastfeeding classes etc etc.
Whatever happened to just winging it. To seeing how it goes? To just living life without over analyzing every minute detail.
Our bodies know how to conceive a baby, grow a baby and provide food for a baby. Why would we think that all of a sudden we are going to fail that baby because we aren't wrapping it right or putting it on the right sleep schedule or taking it to every scheduled Dr's appointment....eek!!
If I could give any advice to a new mother it would be to listen to her heart! Do what works for your family. Don't drive yourself crazy worrying about everything that you don't know about, just be. When people are stressed about what gadgets they need for the new baby I say "all you need are diapers and some blankets to wrap the baby in. If you have nothing else for a week or so you WILL survive....I promise!" I watched an extremely depressing documentary about young girls who were abducted in Uganda and made soldiers. They were married off to their commanders and had babies in the bush. They fought pregnant and with babies on their backs. Obviously this is a VERY extreme example but my guess is that they didn't attend a single breastfeeding or birthing class or read a single book on sleep training. They went with their instincts, birthed their babies and raised them until they could go free and live a normal life.
I'm not advocating not educating yourself about all things parenting/birthing because I'm such an advocate of learning all you can, but rather I'm just pleading with you to go easy on yourself. Don't over analyze parenthood. Love your kid, teach them kindness, love, respect, nourish them and ENJOY these years! Peace.
Feel free to leave a comment about how much I've offended you :) Err wait....on second thought please don't :)
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2 comments:
Great post Kass! Love this and I completely agree with you. You don't learn how to be a mother by reading a book, you learn by BEING a mother.
Love you tons! xoxo
Love it! I totally agree. I remember being a young mom deciding to follow my gut rather than a book or what others told me I should do. Sometimes it was really hard! Parents and Kids will stumble and fall, make mistakes along the way, that's life. I see so many moms who have a death grip on the progression of their kids, the product of which is grown adults who can't function! And when those grown kids fall? They've not learned how to pick themselves back up!
Nuture, Encourage, be an example and Assist. Do not control everything! I love your list: love, respect...
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